Friday, November 21, 2008

A Right Banker

It's a funny old thing this credit crunch. Especially the way it appears to have tightened the sphincter muscles of certain banking types.

A little over a year ago, when the property boom was in full swing, I approached my bank to see how much they would lend me should I consider splashing out and buy myself a home. As it turned out they were happy to lend me something in the vicinity of a quarter of a million dollars.

However the market was manic and obviously heading for a fall so I said thanks but no thanks and waited for the real estate bubble to burst.

Which it duly did.

Anyway now the market's in free-fall and property prices in our fair capital are finally approaching something vaguely resembling reasonable my partner and I thought we'd approach the bank again and see how much we could borrow on our combined incomes.

That is; roughly twice the income that I had when I approached the bank solo last year.

Well the man at the bank did what bankers do best. Took details, crunched numbers, hummed and harred etc etc. In fact he even managed to find the banking details my partner had when she banked with this bank back in 1983.

WARNING - even after a quarter of a century these bastards will still have something on you lurking somewhere within their networks. My mind boggles at the fact they went to the trouble to:
a) move it from a paper record to an electronic one (computer records weren't the norm in 1983)
b) hold onto the records of the banking behaviour of a seven year child.

Right I'll get back to the point of this rambling.

So our grey little banking man finally did all his sums and informed us of the sum the bank would be prepared to lend us in exchange for our life, liberty, happiness, and eternal souls.

It turns out it was only 30K more than what they were prepared to lend me as an individual 14 months ago.

So it seems it's not just been the finance companies that have been guilty of loose lending. I can't imagine them getting this tight, this quickly, unless some pretty bad calls were made in the not too distant past.

Actually it reminds of an old joke that's now been completely destroyed by the European Union and single currency.

Q: Why do the Irish call their currency the Punt?
A: Because it rhymes with banker.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The reason behind this is nothing whatsoever to do with your personal banking histories, or with 'loose lending' from the bank.

What is really going on is that the bank has to find funding for your mortgate from international capital markets, and they are having a difficult time getting ANY new money that way.